For Aliens, By Aliens

A podcast about what it means to be a Hooman

Episode 83: A Cult of Their Own

How many hoomans does it take to make a cult? Not that we’re trying to start one… But if we WERE trying to start one, how many people would it take to officially be called a cult? Well, we aim to find out, and that’s why we’ve built automatic FABA Family registration into your podcast subscription button. So sit back, pour a tall glass of Flavor Aid, and join us. Not that you have much of a choice.

Theme song: “Eye of My Mind” by Wooky (

Episode 82: Eight Legs, No Dicks

You sit on it, you eat on it, you even sleep on it. No, that’s not a dirty riddle. This week your Earth Ambassadors tell the aliens about furniture. On an unrelated note, have you ever wondered if your couch was actually an alien doing reconnaissance  work on you and your loved ones, soaking nutrients out of your skin through osmosis as you sit on it, unaware that you are being spied on and perhaps even slowly eaten alive? Me neither. Anyway, get ready for an oddly randy episode. 

Theme song: “Eye of My Mind” by Wooky (

Episode 81: Hooman Seeking Wives

Things are about to get crowded here in the recording booth! This week, your Earth ambassadors decide it’s finally time to take on a few more wives. And if you’re an alien, that’s probably a totally normal thing to do! But how do they plan to pull this off? By hacking the iTunes terms and conditions of course. Or maybe just creating a profile on the real website that exists called Let’s see how this works out.

Theme song: “Eye of My Mind” by Wooky (

Episode 80: Heigh Ho Dandy Horse!

They say you never forget how to ride a bike, but what happens if you never learned? Well, then you’d know what it’s like to be an alien. Let’s take a minute to soak up that deepness…. Now, join your Earth Ambassadors as they answer all the age-old questions about bikes: What happened in the great Bicycle Rollerblade War? What happened to Lance Armstrong’s missing testicle? What’s the future of bike? Are aliens really just sentient bicycles? Well, hey kids, only you can prevent forest fires. That last bit was just to see if anyone actually reads this far. If you did, then we owe you a Snickers bar. Sorry if you don’t like Snickers bars, we’re fresh out of Reese’s peanut butter cups.

Theme song: “Eye of My Mind” by Wooky (

Episode 79: Oh Hi Mark

Oh hi Aliens. This week your Earth ambassadors celebrate the most talented alien this side of the horse head nebula: Tommy Wiseau. With his film The Room, he forces humanity to take a hard look in the mirror, and this week, we hold a mirror up to that mirror, disrupting the flow of linear time. Luckily, that's the only way this thing makes sense.

Theme song: “Eye of My Mind” by Wooky (

© Jacob Rosok and Aaron Patterson, 2016